Going, Going, Gone

A look at gerunds.

We’ll conclude my trilogy of common words and phrases a new writer needs to eliminate by taking a look…er…with a quick look at gerunds, otherwise known as those pesky “i-n-g verbs.”

In a nutshell, gerunds are considered weak verb choices because they reflect “the act of being in the act”–which is why so many editors frown upon seeing so….er…frown so much when they see so many. To repeat myself a bit, we’re not talking about…er…the problem is not the use of gerunds, but the overuse.

In looking at…er…when I review my own rough drafts, I see i-n-g verbs sneak into my own narrative more than any other “prolific no-no.” In fact, while rereading….er….as I reread my digital copy of Virtual Blue, I see, in some passages, more i-n-g verbs stayed than I care for. The rule of thumb here is the same as the rest, a couple per page is okay. If you have a few per paragraph, things get ugly.

As you can see, rewriting…er…you can rewrite around most gerunds pretty easily during your…er…while you review your second draft. With few exceptions, there’s no reason to keep a gerund if you have other choices. All that said, there’s something to be said for a little variety, and like any other fine seasoning (not the same thing, it’s a noun), sprinkling a few….er…you’re okay if you  sprinkle in a few.

So, to review the basic no-nos (with links to the original articles)

Minimize passive verbs
Minimize adjectives and ly adverbs
Minimize gerunds

Next time, we’ll dig a little deeper into the art of storytelling (shut up) and the finer points of point of view.

Special True-Blood Autographed Vampires Don’t Sparkle Auction

BIG NEWS! Michael West met five cast members of TRUE BLOOD, who signed a copy of VAMPIRES DON’T SPARKLE. This one-of-a-kind collectible (which includes my short story Robot Vampire–just sayin’) will be auctioned off for special cancer research fundraiser!! How! Cool! Is! That! Details here! http://seventhstarpress.blogspot.com/2013/09/true-blood-cast-members-sign-ssp-book.htm

New Interview: Digging Into Virtual Blue

Today I take a trip to the blog of author peer, Seventh Star Press buddy and world-sharing creator Eric Garrison to offer up an extensive talk on Virtual Blue and other subjects. Here’s a preview:

I am thrilled to present this interview with my friend, author RJ Sullivan! RJ and I met a couple of years ago at a writer’s retreat, where we quickly discovered bizarre parallels between our writing. So much so that it led to a shared universe agreement between us where we borrow each other’s characters and events as it fits our stories.

His most recent publication was the dark and sexy Haunting Obsession, but before that was his ghostly thriller, Haunting Blue. Now, he’s coming out with a follow-up to Haunting Blue through Seventh Star Press called Virtual Blue. I’ve had the privilege of being one of his early readers as he’s written the book. It is a fantastic story, and I can’t wait to see it in print in its final form.

Virtual Blue picks up where Haunting Blue left off, finding Blue, aka Fiona Schafer, in college, the events of the previous adventure weighing heavily upon her, when a new and even more bizarre challenge confronts her and her boyfriend Chip. Though the title gives some hint at spoilers, I’ll leave that for RJ to tell.

RJ, it seems to me you’ve crossed genre lines here with Virtual Blue. Where Haunting Blue was pure ghost story, Virtual Blue is something quite different. Could you please explain how you view this blend of science fiction and dark paranormal fantasy?

Both my publishers call me a paranormal thriller author. Narrowing that down, I’ve written two ghost stories. I really had little more to say about ghosts. I looked at other paranormal tropes and demons seemed that step-up intensity that best fit Blue’s world. At the same time, in Haunting Blue I explored a punk girl’s street savvy becoming the deciding factor in a battle with a vengeful ghost. Her boyfriend, Chip, is the weak one, and he plays the dubious part of the person in need of rescue.

Having brought in demons with Rebecca Burton already in a short story (Inner Strength) and knowing I wanted to introduce Burton to Blue, I realized I could do taking Blue out of her element–the streets– and into Chip’s, in a cyber battle that gives him advantages and throws her off her game. So I put all that into a blender and came up with the demon worshippers who conjure techno-magic.

Magic and technology are often shown as contrasts, opposites, in speculative fiction. You bring the two together in a way that feels believable. What works did you look to for inspiration?  Can you come up with an “A meets B” mashup that sums up your story?

Read the entire interview on Eric’s blog here!

 

Strictly, forcefully, authoritatively, kill your ly adverbs…mostly

The ly adverb stands as one flag to many editors that a writer lacks confidence. Stephen King makes the case in On Writing that if a scene is set well enough, if the characters are well-presented, a reader will know from context if a person shuts a door forcefully or gently or spoke harshly or any of these other unattractive adornments.

I’m inclined to agree, though like my previous blog on passive tense, I propose that weak prose comes from overuse rather than any use at all.  The overuse of ly adverbs results in “purple prose,” a melodramatic stew of hack writing hell.

Richard Sherman, the fictional book editor in the classic comedy The Seven Year Itch, describes purple prose as “All that inwardly downwardly pulsating and back with the hair spilled across the pillow malarkey!” And I don’t think I can say it better myself. Every ly verb breaks the fiction rule that “less is more”.

Like passive verbs, ly adverbs should be high on a writer’s extermination list. 9 times out of 10–no, 99 times out of 100–the ly occurrence in a rough draft can be phrased better without it. That said, in spite of King’s claim, even he has snuck in the occasional adverb when it best suits his purpose, as do many other pros.

Here’s a topic for another blog that I need to touch upon now–one difference between a beginner and a pro is that the pro learns and masters the rules. They are aware of the rule, and may make the occasional, conscious choice to break the rule when they know it best serves the story.

RJ’s rule of thumb: Once a chapter, a few times in a novel, those instances can stand as deliberate choices if the writer can defend them to him or her self. Several times a page, sorry, that’s weak writing, and the writer has some work to do.

There’s a second conversation about where the ly should go in sentence, and the most famous split infinitive of pop culture, Roddenberry’s “…to boldly go where no man has gone before.” Yes, I love it too, as much for The Shat’s delivery as the actual words, and having grown up with that phrase, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Written correctly, (see what I did there?) the phrase should be “….to go boldly where no man has gone before.” But no, I wouldn’t dream of changing it.

Another blog topic I may or may not tackle is on acceptable standards from long ago. (Beware the bad habits you can acquire from classic literature–like parenthetical asides, oh my!) So rather than quibble about the exceptions and the famous goofs, let’s just move forward and do better.

To Be or Not To Be–with apologies to Hamlet

The first of a new series on prose fiction do’s and don’ts for new writers.

The passive verb, the state of being, that is, those words your grammar teacher taught you: am, is, are, was, were, have, has, had–and for this conversation, mostly “was“–should be shunned from your prose, often and with prejudice.

I could have picked many topics to start this series, but if I had to point to the first I.D. card of the amateur writer, it is the proliferation of the word “was” sprinkled all over a manuscript draft.

And I’m not judging. This was my major crime against literature when I started out, until my mentor pointed it out and eventually broke me of the habit (Hi, Debra Holland).

A few simple reasons, with examples:

1. The active tense just plain sounds better.  

I was running to the store. vs
I ran to the store.

2. Passive tense lacks needed specifics.

He was tall. He was average looking. vs
He stood head and shoulders above his peers, though not many of them bothered to notice.

3. Passive tense shields accountability–the reason your local providers love it so much in those special snailmail deliveries.

Your cable was disconnected last Tuesday. (by… someone–your neighbors, aliens, terrorists, even! We surely don’t know) vs the far more accurate and damning
We disconnected your cable last Tuesday.

If you find one of your manuscripts is littered with passive verbs, take the time to rewrite it. You’ll be shocked at how much the same story “pops” when you’re done.

A word of caution: you can go overboard with this line of thinking. In fact, for awhile, I tried to remove 100% of any state of being from my prose. The dubious good news. It can be done, but such a path will make you a bit twitchy at parties, so years ago I made my peace with the passive tense and let a few slip back in. Sometimes “I am done with this topic” says it all, and that’s okay.

If you are one of these passive verb offenders, don’t beat yourself up. The good news is that it’s not too late to begin the training.

R.J’s rule of thumb, if you see four or five passive verbs in a paragraph (and we all slip, even those who are years beyond knowing better) you need to rework those sentences. If you’re seeing two or three per page, that’s probably fine.

Let’s get this party started!

So over the weekend I opened the two-story lounge where I will be hosting a big party over the next couple of weeks.

No, I didn’t rent a ballroom. There, obvious joke over.

Two of my stories are going live within a few days of each other and I’m super-stoked. The release dates are extremely fluid because Seventh Star is a sort of crunch mode after some unavoidable delays earlier this summer, and both of my books post Very Soon Now. We just don’t know….exactly when. So I said “what the heck” and decided to host an interactive party on Facebook.

Okay, it’s more like a virtual lounge. In fact, that’s what I call it, the R.J. Sullivan Two-Story Release Party Lounge. I’m so clever. Essentially it’s a temporary public group on Facebook where fans, friends and peers can drop in and out and see the latest news, play some trivia, and I’ll raffle for all sorts of prizes, thanks to my author buds.

Plus–its primary purpose–to make it easy for you to track the release of my new science fiction Singles novelette, the Fate of the Red Lotus, due out mid week. And of course, capping off with the long-anticipated follow-up in the Adventures of Blue Shaefer–Virtual Blue! We’ll have excerpts and art reveals before it goes live.

And with the convenience of being in a group, the update posts won’t scroll several pages off your feed in a couple of hours. So even if you can only check in once a day, you won’t miss any updates.

Oh no, you’re thinking, I can’t bear to hear RJ talk about himself for days and days. To which I say–FREE stuff! You love to read, don’t you? (Yes, RJ, why else would we be here, duh!) So I’ve asked several of my talented and generous author buds to help make it worth your while to stick around, including Eric Garrison, John F. Allen, Chantel Noordeloos, Debra Holland, Kat French, and James W. Kirk, and that’s just the folks I reached out to on short notice.

The list is growing. We’ll have lots of ebook giveaways–mainly because ebooks are so easy to handle in something like this, but don’t be surprised if some “actual” things may need to be boxed and mailed before it’s over. Wow, I have a way with words.

So why are you still reading this? The party’s already started and going on without you. Click here already!

7th Annual Paranormal Meet n Greet August 10!

What: The 7th Annual Paranormal Meet n Greet
When: Saturday, August 10, Noon- 4 PM
Where: The Historic Haunted Hannah House, 3801 Madison Ave. Indianapolis, IN 46227
How Much: This event is 100% FREE! FREE for vendors and FREE for patrons! No registration required! Just show up!

Did we mention it’s free?

The 7th Annual Paranormal Meet n Greet is like an art festival across the lawn of a haunted house. Scratch that, it IS an art festival across the lawn of a haunted house. The event is set up primarily for local and regional ghost investigation groups to meet, network, exchange information, trade stories and otherwise hang out.  Click here to join the Facebook event.

2011
2011

There will also be vendors of all sorts, and this will be the third annual appearance by the Indiana Horror Writers, with our huge selection of ghostly and ghastly tales to tempt you. I’ve been privileged to attend all three years of the IHW’s involvement with this, first as a new author promoting my first-ever novel, and now returning on the eve of my third book.

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2012, with RJ and "Maxine Marie" from Haunting Obsession.
2012, with RJ and “Maxine Marie” from Haunting Obsession.

Last year it was the debut event of Haunting Obsession. And although I won’t be debuting anything new this year, I’ll [plenty of copies on-hand at the Indiana Horror Writer’s table, where we’ll have a LOT of new releases on tap between us.

Michael West will have a wide selection, including the just re-released Wide Game and the popular anthology Vampires Don’t Sparkle.

Eric Garrison is bringing the new edition of Four ’til Late, the first of his road ghosts trilogy.

John F. Allen makes his first appearance to this event as a published author with his urban fantasy The God Killers.

Crystal Leflar is bringing her own stories of horror and the supernatural as well as a variety of selections from Nighscape Press.

Kathy Watness is bringing a wide selection of anthologies that cover a range of the strange and fantastic.

Whether you prefer your scares ghostly or ghastly, you’ll find much to love at the Indiana Horror Writers tent. Hope to see you there!

The Hannah House is located at 3801 Madison Ave. Indianapolis, IN 46227. It can easily be reached from 465 by exiting on the US31 North exit, also known as East Street. The third light down is National Ave – go right. The very next light is Madison Ave. The house sits on the corner of this intersection.

Looking ahead! Or, where the frack is Virtual Blue, RJ?

So after an exciting launch of Haunting Obsession almost exactly a year ago, things have slowed down, with lots of talk of things to come, but little to show for it–so far.

Not that I’ve come to a stop, not by any stretch. My short story Starter Kit was released through Apex Book Company, part of the Dark Faith Invocations anthology which includes a Stoker-winning story by Lucy A. Snyder. A Big Book of Strange, Weird and Wonderful Volume II also hit in December, which included “Inner Strength” (a Rebecca Burton short story) and the Seventh Star Press American Cancer Association fundraising anthology Vampires Don’t Sparkle included Robot Vampire, which has become a reader favorite since its release in March.

But that’s not a lot, and the wait has been long, but I hope well worth it. In early 2013, with deadline approaching and a long way to go, I took a few month writing sabbatical (not entirely, but mostly) to finish Virtual Blue, the second book in the Adventures of Blue Shaefer. Add to that, some unavoidable delays that are the reality of small press publishing, we were pushed back probably another month. And so, without yet committing to a release date, I can announce with confidence that Virtual Blue is coming out next month.

The story picks up with Chip and Blue two years after the events of Haunting Blue, carrying on an uneasy long distance relationship as they attend colleges in different parts of the country. For reasons obvious at the end of Haunting Blue, things are not going well for them. Things are so bad, that Blue arranges to fly back to Indiana to break up with Chip over Thanksgiving break. She thinks she’s in for a miserable weekend, and she’ right–but she doesn’t know the half of it.

“Hell Just Went Digital.” That’s the tagline and hints of things to come. The many people who loved Rebecca Burton, my paranormal investigator from Haunting Obsession, will be happy to know she will play a big part in the next installment, and I include a few other surprises and characters from other Seventh Star authors.

At 90,000 words, Virtual Blue is my most ambitious project (certainly my longest). There’s ghosts. Also demons. And psychopaths. And warriors. And sorcerers. And swordfights. There’s a bathroom sink, but in retrospect, I should have made it a kitchen sink.

If you enjoyed Haunting Blue and the relationship between Blue Shaefer and Chip, you will find much to love here. That said, by design and based on pre-reader feedback, you don’t need to have read the first book to enjoy the second (more on that below).

Virtual Blue will not be out in time for the Paranormal Meet n Greet. It’s a choice between rushing production or taking the time to make it right. Seventh Star has been supportive times a million. Hyperbole aside, I took extra time with this. I wanted to make this the best effort I could. It’s what my readers deserve, and what you’ll always get. It just might not always be as fast as I’d like it.

So all that said….after I turned in Virtual Blue, I had some time on my hands, as well as a desire to stretch my genre muscles and to explore strange new worlds, so to speak. So I started messing around with a sci-fi spaceship idea I’d had for awhile, and before I knew it, I’d drafted The Fate of the Red Lotus, the first of a series of space opera novelettes.  I grew up reading the spaceship fiction of Andre Norton, Elizabeth Moon, and of course, watching certain tales on TV created by Gene Roddenberry, and finally put my own slant on the classic genre. The first Red Lotus story will hit later this fall, as a Seventh Star Single, and if you love it as much as my pre-readers, we might see a new series before too long.

But wait, there’s more! As the year wraps up, Seventh Star is scheduling a re-printed, authorized version of Haunting Blue, the first book in the Adventures of Blue Shaefer, featuring a new  cover and interior art by Series Illustrator  Bonnie Wasson, giving my three novels a unified series look for the first time ever.

And I may have a few more tricks up my sleeve. Thanks for sticking with me. The wait is going to be soooo worth it. I can’t wait to share this. Watch this website and Facebook for more details. You can also follow the Author R.J. Sullivan Fan Club Facebook Page, my FB author business page,  and my Twitter account to ensure you won’t miss a thing.

No gods were harmed during this interview with John F. Allen!

Last weekend, Seventh Star Press author John F. Allen launched his first-ever title, The God Killers, at Fletcher Place Arts and Books in downtown Indianapolis. It was a huge success. He’ll be joining Eric Garrison, Michael West, and me at Fandomfest this weekend, all four members of our guerilla marketing group The Corvus Quartet (Google Corvus Constellation) with our books loaded and ready to dazzle.

Cue the synopsis!

the-god-killers-cover SSPIn The God Killers, the First Book of The God Killers Legacy, former professional art thief Ivory Blaque is hired to procure a pair of antique pistols and gets much more than she bargained for when several attempts are made on her life. Her client turns out to be a shadowy government agent who reveals that she is descended from a race of immortals, and that the pistols are linked to her unique heritage and the special psychic gifts she possesses. He uses the memories of her father to guilt her into working for him.

Ivory eventually gives in to his request, and in return, he presents her with her father’s journal, which was written in an unbreakable code. Bishop believes that she is the only one capable of breaking the code and unlocking the plans of the vampire hierarchy. But when the city’s top vampire is a sexy incubus with an attraction for her and she’s assigned a hot new lycan enforcer to protect her, she finds herself caught between two sets of rock hard abs. To regain her autonomy, clear her name, unlock the secrets of her past, and protect the lives of those closest to her, Ivory must play along with the forces trying to manipulate her. Ivory’s life is rapidly spiraling out of control and headed for an explosive conclusion which she just might not survive.

——

Thanks for taking the time for this. The first question that comes to mind, having done the same thing, what was your experience as a man, writing a story from a woman’s point of view? Talk about that how you approached it.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAThanks for having me RJ! A lot of the urban fantasy out there is written by a woman, from the perspective of a woman or both. So, when I thought of writing the character I was faced with what POV to use. I chose first person because I thought that it gave me the greatest opportunity to experience what Ivory goes through and give a lot of internal dialogue. Let me say it was indeed a BIG challenge, but one I was ready and excited to accept. I used my wife as a template for the character’s personality traits—most of them at least. I also consulted her on how she or any female might act and react in certain situations I place Ivory in. She proved to be an invaluable resource and my muse.

You’ve shared with me some stories about growing up as an African American male in Indianapolis, and the expectations your peers placed upon you. How tough was it to be a comic book and SF geek in that climate, and what were your takeaways looking back?

It was extremely challenging for me as an African American comic geek growing up. Many of my friends just weren’t into those sorts of things. A lot of the neighborhood kids—especially males—were playing sports or otherwise engaged, while I drawing, had my nose in a book/comic or was playing outside (Cowboys & Indians, Cops & Robbers, Superheroes & villains, etc…) with the other geeks. The experience was very rewarding in regards to my writing career because it developed my imagination and led me to create the stories I write with dynamic characters like Ivory.

You main character Ivory is a private investigator, a career you chose in real life at some point. Is Ivory’s world purely tapping the fictions of a noir/ urban fantasy / adventure  setting, or were you able to bring any of your experience to her world? (You haven’t killed any vampires or werewolves, have you?)

I did put a bit of my experiences with the military and as a private investigator into Ivory’s world. She also owns an art gallery and I studied art history and visual art in college, so that background came in handy as well. I’d say that a lot of her adventures are plotted out with my own experiences and line of thinking in mind. And to answer your other question, no I haven’t…at least that I know of.

ivory Chicago

Your setting: why Chicago?

I chose Chicago because it’s close to Indianapolis (Ivory has ties to Indianapolis btw) it is the largest Metropolitan Midwestern city in the country, I’m intimately familiar with its culture, geography and history (frequent trips and my brother lived there) and there’s always something going on in the city.

What are you favorite genre authors? Include comic books as well. Particularly, which ones inspired the Ivory Blaque novels?

Robert B. Parker, L.A. Banks, James R. Tuck, Faith Hunter, Kevin Hearne, Walter Mosley, Laurell K. Hamilton, Tom Clancy, Jenna Black, Jon Merz, Jewell Parker Rhodes, Dwayne McDuffie, Lucy A. Snyder, Chris Claremont, Amanda Stevens, Neil Gaiman, Seressia Glass and Stan Lee.

How has publishing changed in the last decade, and how has being here, now, similar or different from your hopes and expectations growing up? Do you see publishing currently in a good or bad place?

I think that publishing has changed in that there are quite a few more self-published authors out there and self publishing isn’t frowned upon quite as much as it has been in the past. Also, I notice that since the number of self-published authors has grown, many small press publishers have taken the opportunity to seek out those talented authors and sway them to their presses. In turn, many BIG publishers are offering self-publication imprints to sway indie authors their way as well. I guess the bottom line is that authors have a lot more options on how they can approach the release of their work to the public and with those options, it give the authors more control over their creative properties and a larger chuck of the revenue in some cases.

One factor that helps Seventh Star stand apart is their lineup of artists and the interior art, which comes “standard” with all releases. A factor that makes you unique among their authors is that you have some art background coming into this process. Talk about working with your artist and how your unique background affected the process.

I think that my having a background as a visual artist is a double edged sword most of the times. On the one hand, I am VERY descriptive of what I see in my mind’s eye and can relate to the actual creative process in which visual artists use. However, another artist may find it a challenge to work with me at times, due to the fact that I’m so descriptive and intent on how things should look. I often find myself sketching out the characters and giving them to the artists to use as a reference, because I have such a lock on my initial vision(s).

Congratulation on your book launch! I’m reading it now and really digging it. Besides future volumes of Ivory Blaque, what can we expect from you?

I have a Sword & Sorcery short story which will be featured in an anthology titled, “Thunder on the Battlefield”. I’m also working on expanding Ivory’s world, what I’ve affectionately dubbed, “The Ivoryverse.” Readers can expect other characters to be introduced in the Ivory Blaque series and to eventually be featured in their own short stories, collections and novels sometime in the future. Look for a team of covert, military operatives, codenamed: Shadow Corps and a sci-fi espionage themed character named Knight Ranger, who makes a cameo appearance in The God Killers to get some short story/novella/novel love in the VERY near future!

Order The God Killers at Barnes and Noble or Amazon!

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